It's been a while since I wrote..
So what have I been doing? I have been trying to experience 2007.
What do I mean?
For people who knows me, knows that I lead a bloody hectic lifestyle, struggling to be a research scientist, a lyricist, a teacher, a mother, a wife, a housewife.. and to be sane.. everyday..
End of December last year, I went into a depressed mood, as I was terribly overworked, and underpaid (not in the monetary sense). 2006 was a very scary year for me, as it was the year that I finally gave up being a fulltime mum to my daughter Ashley, and went back to work. It was the year that Ashley cried the most as she was suddenly remover from my care to be looked after by strangers in te childcare centre.. 2006 was the year that I do not get to see my own husband everyday, as he starts working nights and I work in the day, that I miss him terribly.. 2006 was the year that we started FM Pop Music School, 2006 was the year that we did many school seminars to talk about mandarin pop culture.. 2006 was when I started teaching lyrics writing...2006 was when I was given 6 lyrics to write within a short span of 2 weeks and only one of sold...
2006... was bloody tiring for me..
So, I thought.. 2007 would be better, I hope.. as I stood and stared through my kitchen window, at the sky full of fireworks.
Today is the 10th Jan 2007. After having experienced 10 days of 2007, what does it taste like?
The same! I am still that crazy research scientist who is struggling to be a mum, a wife, a teacher etc etc..And on top of that, I am trying to be an author too! Yes, I am currently at Chapter 2 of my own book! (Details coming up soon.. )And since I only have 24 hours.. I am going to cut down the amount of time spent on lyrics writing and concentrate on my book, after office and baby-hours..Lyrics writing has taken up a huge part of my life. It not only makes me, it also breaks me. Everytime I write a piece of sad lyrics, I get consumed by the sadness and can't snap out of it for the longest time.. Everytime my lyrics get rejected because of ridiculous poltical reasons, I feel so unwanted and small.. Everytime I run out of clever ideas, I constipate.. Everytime I would be demanding myself to come up with a clever or touching line, for if I don't, I look down upon myself..
Life as a lyricist, who is also a bloody greedy perfectionist, is unhealthy. I have been unhealthy, both physically and mentally. I don't appreciate good food, and I don't appreciate good life. It's 2007, so what I am going to do is, cut down on my lyrics writing, and try to regain my physical and mental health. Know how I try to regain my physical health? I am starting to cook dinner! Lots of greens and fish and proteins. Edible, though far from tasty..But it is a Start!
As for mental health, I am actively trying to train students into lyricist, who can hopefully propagate good writing techniques.. With less emotional load, hopefully I will be a happier person..
So my resolution for the rest of the 355 days of 2007 will be.. Be healthy, be happy. What is yours?